The auditorium was nearly full when Max and Pam arrived for Sally’s reading. Max was glad to see so many students in attendance. The Physics and English departments did a great job getting the students out for events. There would certainly be a lot of extra credit points given out tonight. In addition to the students, quite a few of the college faculty were in attendance, along with a surprising number of community members. Maybe Sally Mansfield was a bigger deal than he thought.
Nora began her introduction. “I am so thrilled to introduce Dr. Sally Mansfield, author of two successful novels along with numerous short stories and essays. Her newest novel, “As If by Chance” was released last August. As you can see in her bio, she graduated summa cum laude from the University of Massachusetts with a double major in English Literature and Physics. She completed a doctorate in Literature, with a focus on contemporary women writers, before enrolling in the Iowa Writer’s Workshop. She began her academic career at Columbia University and now holds the position of Associate Professor of English at Springfield College. Tonight, she will read excerpts from her recent essays and stories. I am hoping she’ll read from her new novel as well. After her presentation, she will be happy to take questions from the audience.”
Sally walked confidently to the podium and began:
“Consider this: You one out of about 8 billion persons on one of eight planets that revolves around one of the 100 billion stars in the Milky Way galaxy which is one galaxy in over 100 billion galaxies in the universe.
Your mass represents about 2 x 10-49 % of the known mass of the universe.”
Sally projected a slide that said:
0.0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000002%
That is 0. point 48 zeros, 2 %
Your mass is so inconsequential, your existence so unlikely that if I were a statistician, I would say with great certainty that you do not exist.
But you do. Did you ever wonder why?
And did you ever wonder why we humans think the universe exists to serve us?”
Max glanced around the auditorium taking mental note of who was in attendance. The usual suspects and… Michael? He could not remember seeing his son at a lecture. Michael often attended sporting events and the occasional play but never a lecture. With his expected major of health science, Max wasn’t sure what he would find interesting about Sally Mansfield’s talk. He must need extra credit in one of his courses or something.
Max gently tapped Pam’s arm and whispered, “Look who is in the house tonight, as he gestured towards the row where Michael was seated. Pam followed his gaze and nodded. “Yes, he mentioned that he was coming. He read her second novel in a gen ed class lit class last year and loved it. He can’t wait to read the new one”
Shaking his head, Max thought, “WHY is everyone so enamored with Sally Mansfield? Sally Mansfield!!! The novel she submitted with her tenure file was totally ordinary. It is like Sally Mansfield, through some kind of black magic, has infiltrated the world of literary fiction and no one is willing to point out that the empress has no clothes. And how is it that Pam knows what Michael is reading in his lit classes, and I don’t? I’m the lit guy, damn it! I could help him differentiate drivel from greatness. What are they teaching in those gen ed classes anyway?
“Sally Mansfield is a just a junior faculty member. She couldn’t be more than, what? 35? No…let’s see…. I left Columbia five years ago. Sally was gone a couple years before that. She’d been a Columbia for, what? six years? no. seven.. when she left without tenure. So, let’s see, five years, plus two, plus seven more…
It must have been 14 years since Sally arrived at Columbia, and she must have been early thirties when she got there. So, she must be in her mid-forties now.
Mid-forties and she has 3 novels and a slew of short stories. The volume is impressive, but the quality… well, I read that first book and it was unbelievably pedestrian- simply unexceptional. Those glowing reviews— there are no standards anymore. Anything passes as literature these days. We live in a world where everyone is above average and no one can distinguish real quality. It is a crime to praise the truly excellent, lest the mediocre feel bad about themselves.”
“Shhh! Max!!” Pam tapped his arm and glared at him. “You are muttering out loud and I am trying to listen. So is everyone else! What is wrong with you? Shut up!”
Max shifted his focus back to Sally, who exuded warmth and natural confidence as she spoke. He squirmed in his seat trying to pay attention to her words. Something about black holes colliding 5 billion years ago. His mind raced: Huh? A metaphor? For what? Damn geeky scientists. The physics students must love this. Ah yes, it is a metaphor for how each action sends ripples into the universe that impact all things for all eternity. Yeah. Right. Oh God. How long is this going to last? Max was certain that the impact of the presentation tonight would not last until the morning, let alone all eternity.
Max thought of his own work. REAL work—work of significance. Work with intellectual heft and academic merit. Not some cheap pseudoscience like the drivel being presented on stage.
At the words, “Thank you so much for your kind attention.” Nora walked up to the podium, gave Sally a hug and turned to the audience. “I think we have time for one question.”
Max set up straighter and was relieved that there would not be a protracted Q&A period. It had been a long day.
A student raised her hand and asked, “Dr Mansfield, I understand your point that on the scale of the universe we are pretty insignificant. But there are 8 billion people on earth, so we must be very significant on our own planet, correct?”
Sally smiled, “Well, we certainly have a disproportionate impact on the environment and believe ourselves to be the rulers of the earth. But, in terms of biodiversity, we are less important than you might think. Humans comprise 0.01% of the worlds biomass; bacteria outweigh us by a factor of over a thousand. If the earth had a perspective, I am not sure it would care much one way or the other about humans. Still, as I tried to emphasize, that doesn’t absolve us of the responsibilities that we bear towards the earth and each other.
Nora closed out the evening, “Let’s thank Dr. Mansfield again for an inspiring and fascinating presentation.” Another enthusiastic round of applause.
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